Mary, My Parenting Coach

He calls his alone time "brood moment". (Baguio City, 2017)

Today, we celebrate the Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God. While going through the various readings and reflections, it struck me, perhaps for the first time, that Mary was not just mother to Jesus at the nativity scene and at the foot of the Cross. Mary was mother to Jesus throughout his human life.

Following what a favorite spiritual guide often says, I took time to listen to the silence in the Scriptures about Mary's key role in the life of Jesus, particularly during His adolescence. I pondered on the kind of mother Mary probably was to Jesus who was not a typical adolescent and who had a mind of His own even at a young age. She may have been pained by some of His life choices, but at the end of the day, she chose to be there for Him without getting in the way of His growth. She was His most ardent supporter but she never tried to control Him.  She may have wanted to protect Him and keep Him in the safety of their nest, but she let Him grow in the big world to become the person that the Father willed Him to be. She trusted the Father's will, difficult though it was.

Somehow this speaks to me about my own parenting with my adolescent son especially now that I will be a long-distance parent to him. The transition to this new job, which means relocating to Southern Philippines, would have been so much easier if I didn't have this long-distance parenting arrangement to worry about. As I turn to Mary as the mother of Jesus throughout his life on earth, my worries and anxieties ebb a bit. Today, I discovered in Mary a companion and guide in my journey as a Mother to my adolescent son. I learn from her that I need to trust God's work in my son.  I need to let him be his own person even if the person he is becoming may sometimes be at odds with my own values, expectations, and desires for him. Mary's parenting reminds me of the need to trust in God's faithful love against all odds. And Mary's journey shows me that it won't be easy but it's a journey worth taking.